This is a long post but it's positively mind blowing, so thank you for taking the time to read about an experience that I think is worth sharing with others. This was a recent custom ring project that I was commissioned by a neighbor to make, which would utilize the cremation ashes from his recently deceased father. It is important to note that this was my first time to ever see, or be in the presence of, cremation ashes and my only expectation was that I would be working with a fine powder-like substance.
What occurred while making this cremation ring is something that extends beyond logic and reason, but I feel that it's necessary to state that even as a creative person (with a degree in philosophy), I lean on reason and logic as fundamental tools in making decisions and understanding the objective world, which is, in my opinion, something ultimately incomprehensible due to the limitations of human cognition and it being too enormous, complex, and dynamic of a thing to understand in its totality, as it is constantly in a state of becoming itself in an infinite number of ways. Nevertheless, reason as a method-of-understanding-the-world can still provide us with a clear and grounded sense of 'knowing' which I find indispensable as a human navigating the world.
On the contrary, as a creative person I engage in the act of creating on a daily basis, which requires me to be in a state of openness and awareness of being in the moment in such a way that, at any given moment, I must be able to suspend my own direction so that the materials and elements involved, and the process itself, can take us all somewhere unexpected or otherwise unforeseen. This state of suspension and openness to the present moment is what I think fertilizes creativity, discovery, and the soil that leads to breakthroughs and innovation.
So, my neighbor brought over a jar of his father's ashes and we sketched out lots of ideas for the ring, which would be rugged with a nice patina, yet symbolic, featuring meaningful symbols such as a crescent moon, fish, music note (he was a jazz musician in a 50’s band called 'Stardusters'), a leaf, stars, and a Libra zodiac. We would also somehow incorporate the ashes.
His father (whom I never met) was a renaissance man who lived a very vibrant and active life and who seemed very cool, smart, stylish, and creative. My neighbor, the apple not falling far from the tree, also carries these traits. So I wanted the ring to be awesome, of course, but I didn't realize the ring had plans of its own.
Some time passed since the initial consultation and after I returned home from two vacations over the timespan of two months (Italy, Germany, then Exuma), I finally began working on the ring, and with Father's Day being in the following week, I knew I had to get it done in time because the timing would be perfect.
Not expecting anything other than a powdery substance, I opened the jar of ashes.
That's when I was absolutely stunned, as I observed for the first time in my life the literal and actual granulated bones of a human being, which is what cremation ashes (obviously) are. “What was I expecting”.... I know, I know, but I thought they would be more fine and powdery, like ash typically is -- but these were clearly and obviously granulated bones, the internal architecture of our very being, the framework of our core that will return to the Earth after a long and insane 100 years (if we're lucky).
This immediately made me feel like he was with me, that I was actually not alone, and like some sort of recognition of that was necessary, so, what did I do? I put my hand on my heart, closed my eyes, and said, "Wherever you are, I send you love and light, and I know how dearly your family loved you."
Maybe it sounds weird, but it was an instinctual feeling to acknowledge him, his life, and the remains of his body that I was holding in my hands. I started talking to him without knowing whether or not it was actually landing anywhere, but it just felt right.
So, this was no longer "making a ring" for my neighbor, I mean, the bones of a dearly beloved human being were in my presence, in my home, and in my hands, and for all I know they could still contain energy of some sort. Did you know that our skeletons generate red and white blood cells? Bones are technically living tissue that grow and repair themselves. So I lit some sage, put on some 50's jazz, and started reviewing my notes for the ring. It was now a vibe and creative collaboration with something unseen but present.
I began making the ring and quickly realized that this needed to be two rings— one to highlight the ashes and one to highlight the symbolism of his father's character. After some deliberation, we decided to move forward with two rings instead of one.
So, I started on the ring which would feature the ashes.
First, I made two gold borders for the ring which would "contain" the ashes that would flow like a central river down the band, soldering the gold bars onto the copper band, and after quenching the final soldering of the ring in water, as it was piping hot, I moved onto sanding it.
This is when things got weird, and it was a good thing that I stay open, aware, and ready for whatever because,
and I swear to God this struck me like an unforeseen cannonball,
after loading the sanding bit into my Dremel and holding it in my right hand,
and with the ring in my left hand,
I looked down only to see that a
perfectly shaped heart
had formed naturally in the firescale on the band of the ring.
WHAT.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME.
A PERFECT HEART THAT FORMED IN THE FIRE?
WHAT.
I was totally shook, head to toe, and couldn't believe my eyes.
I want to reiterate that I had nothing at all to do with the formation of the heart.
I simply looked down and there it was.
UN-REAL.
I AM STILL SCREAMING.
Shocked and in awe, and mildly shaking from excitement, I remembered the initial greeting and sending his father "love and light" and recognizing, out loud to him, that I knew how much he was loved and adored by his family.
Was this heart created from his aether…., was he at my workbench with me…., was he wanting me to reciprocate the same message back to his son and family?
And did he, somehow, energetically intervene creatively in a way that would defy logic, by making a perfectly shaped heart appear on the ring that I was making for his son which would contain his ashes??
What in the world. I couldn't get past the fact of what had just happened. My mind was completely blown. So I start taking photos of the heart, of course, to send to my neighbor.
While this could be perceived as nothing more than a coincidence, I am utterly unable to see this as merely coincidental and randomly occurring phenomena, but rather as emergent phenomena from the psychical realm of the universe; as a wink from the profound and undeniable wonders and mystery that give life its meaning and richness; as a nod from the ground floor of all Being that brings with it the sparkle, magic, and inexplicable interconnectedness of our existence in the universe at large.
For me, it was a moment in time that affirmed humanity's cosmic flavor and the true depth and value of the immaterial aspect of our existence. Words cannot contain it, nor logic.
This had to be his stardust speaking to us.
I can't even wrap my head around the fact that the jazz band he was in was called the Stardusters and here we are, with his literal and actual stardust, while a mysterious heart appeared from the fire. It was like being hit by a psychonautical comet of divine synchronicity.
Absolutely insane that this was happening. I couldn't wait to tell my neighbor and act like a crazy person about it.
While I cannot prove that the heart came by way of the energy of his father, really though, what are the odds of a perfectly shaped heart naturally forming during the process of combining fire-metal-air-water with time and movement, which would depend upon a plentitude of physical variables coming together in the exact moment, under the proper conditions, to somehow randomly and spontaneously create the shape of a heart. And of all the shapes it could have been.
Those odds just seemed impossible. Or they seemed more impossible than his unseen energy stepping in for a quick hello. Energy never dies, it is eternal and cannot be destroyed, even in fire. Energy gives life to fire.
For me, this was a positively mind-blowing, magical lesson from big mystery, which used me as nothing more than an instrument to communicate the critical importance of remaining open, aware, and receptive to the moment, to the impossible, to the dimension of mysteriousness, and to the complexities of human life which defy easy explanations, so that we can and must continue to open ourselves to the depths of human experience that enrich life in ways that rational analysis cannot fully encompass.
Fly high in the stars, Mr. Rotunda, we received the cosmic message from your stardust. 💫
